Back after a hiatus

It's quite some time since I was here...
Have been busy, extremely tied up, however cliched it may sound...but, here it is, just haven't had the time to breathe..
The past month and a half has been a literal mixed bag. Multitude of happenings which have left me drained out and tired...and it is only now that I'm taking some time to introspect.
FIRST, there have been changes on the professional front - went ahead and said no to a prized role that would have been a natural progression, something you can say I was being groomed for...saying NO is a firm decision..but..just to think of it..letting go of authority is a mixed thing. One hand - you seem to be getting powerless which is not a very happy feeling if you know what I mean, and the other end you feel a sense of freedom. Freedom to choose your own path, turn adventurous again, make mistakes, need not be tied to a pattern!
SECOND, my second child has started with his Playgroup in Big school. And there I am everyday sitting at his school with a host of other parents like me. Why are we there? because the school wants us to be there for reasons of getting the kids adjusted to the ways of big schools. So there I am doing nothing and observing small kids playing in the garden with so much abandon. And you know what I feel ? - a pang of envy...! Can you imagine that??!!! Just to see that they are so free, so aloof and so happy! That is how God made us you see...and here we are ..we are the ones solely responsible for creating all these shackles around us. Now, getting little out of the philosophical tone - this whole school episode does deserve a dedicated blog....more on it later..
THIRD, there's my Granny's death...she was 95 and passed away. Looking at it one way (which may sound quite impassionate) - she did see it all and the final time had come. I was surprised at my reaction when I saw her lifeless. Actually, I didn't start howling or crying. Not that I had a very close day-to-day interaction kind of a relationship with her..but, still..she was my Granny and it was a sad thing that she's just gone. But, I, for whom controlling tears has been a problem all throughout, was quite composed. That is the word for the outside world..but, believe me..to be frank...I didn't really feel something so painful. But, again very surprisingly, there came the moment when she started her last journey....ppl lifted her and all that and that's when the whole bottled up emotions came out stumbling! There I was again surprised!!...But, it was there...the triviality of all this. There it was like a slap in my face...that whatever you do...this is what is the final thing..we all have that final destination to reach... It's too big a thing which probably I am not capable of writing about. I feel so small in front of LIFE's biggest reality...the END.
But, does that deter us from doing what we are doing...actually NO. Here at one end I was seeing that a person is just no more...and the other end, there are those little happy children playing and discovering life so beautifully..
So, there it is...that is the reality, that is the beauty of LIFE. GOD has bestowed us with life to discover little joys, nurture our young ones, enjoy the satisfaction of seeing them grow strong, travel through the journey of life with nice things and not so nice things along the way...and LIVE! The end is inevitable..but, then, there is this whole journey in between..we are blessed to have got the opportunity...so, let's do that....LIVE and celebrate it!

Well...well...will just come out of that...

So, that's how life has treated me over the past few weeks. To say the minimum, I am tired and can drop dead anytime. I have been running and running in multiple directions, in my quest to give my bit wherever required. In my endeavour to pay attention to all needs...

You know what I need just now...yes that BREAK!!! Just reminds me of one of my earlier blogs! But, seriously I need one. Am sure it is'nt very much in sight for a long, long time.

Anyway, here's to LIFE and my renewed faith in God and all things HE has created! HE has actually charted out our plan you see...it's just that we are discovering it each day. So, let's enjoy the process !